What I REALLY Want

I have an eating problem.  No, I'm not a hundred pounds overweight, so you can't tell, but I roam the house looking for food some most days.

For instance, this evening.  What I REALLY wanted was a bowl of Frosted Flakes cereal.  (We had a very late lunch, so we didn't do dinner.)  We don't have any Frosted Flakes.  So I had a piece of pineapple, a glass of water, a few jalapeno kettle chips, a glass of water, some cheddar & sour cream chips, another drink of water, and finally a slice of marzipan stollen.

None of those "did it" for me.  But I am full, even though I'm not satisfied.

Read that last sentence again - I'll wait.

How many times does that describe my body...my mind...my very soul.  I hunt around for "stuff" to fill me, but what I REALLY want, I don't get, usually because of my own personal choice to take something lesser.

I REALLY want to follow Christ ever so closely.  I REALLY want to know God intimately, trust Him, rest in Him.  I REALLY want to believe that God not only loves me and gave His son for me, but that He likes me.

What do I take instead?  Facebook postings to see who I can rile up or get a positive response from.  I escape in TV or a book.  I get my worth through my cooking, my "wife-ness", or my children.  All of those are idols, and all are filling, but not satisfying.